Artificial Greenery Fan Gifts

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

I fart more than that!

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

Look! There's a photo of our eco club's Earth Day actions in the newspaper! Sports. Power up the green machine!! I could use more copies. Me too. They're going to really power up my college applications.

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

"Pretty impressive for a product of a 3-D printer."

'I SAID you'd threatened to throw them out once too often!'

In the houseplant cemetery.

At the signing of William C.Lockland's latest best selling wheelbarrow.

"Don't be fooled. Chaos reigns."

"Our carbon footprint has been very, very good to us."

"I love the moment when they discover we paid their garden a nocturnal visit."

"My new boyfriend is free range!"

abduction online.com

A bad gnome economy.

'I see you're admiring my gnome Chomsky.'

"It's nice, but not quite the electric car I was hoping for."

'I want you to know we're 100% sustainable now. We've phased out tarpits and switched to solar panels and double glazing!'

"It's my side hustle."

"Should anyone present think Dan’s tree-hugging has gone off the rails, speak now or forever hold your peace."

Caterpillar to butterfly: 'Great disguise, Max. How'd you do it?'

Garden Centre - "...she thinks she's getting a mink coat!"

Man in gas guzzler has a 'Go Green' registration.

"I've replanted the hanging basket with flowers that'll survive the coming winter. . .They're plastic."

"Y'know Bruce, you can just click on the 'Forgot Password' button, right?"

"In the end, I chose not to wait to be phased out."

"I come from a broken gnome"

Gnomes in Winter

Cheese in a Can.

Cabbage, Lettuce, Beard.

'If you pretend to water these fake flowers they'll last longer.'

'As an anti consumer society protester I want to be self-sufficient. Unfortunately, I'm not a farmer or a gardener. That's why I've got to eat what got ran over on the motorway.'

"Might get this one. It's free of stuff I'd never even heard of."