Artful Satire Fans Pillows

'In future a reg number will suffice, ok.'

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

Joe's 'Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions' Bar.

"...No it does state here quite clearly...the right to bear arms...not arm bears."

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

End the Winter Blues

'It's a boy. He's healthy and coming along fine, but he may be a little crnkt at birth owing to his claustrophobia. He will have feminine tendencies but is not actually gay. In fact, he'll eventually develop a taste for hard liquor and trashy women...'

"C'mon people! All for me and me for me!"

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

'Does it bother anyone else that our entire business is based on one questionable product?'

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

"You calm down."

'Who's the new guy?'

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

"I'd like to see you do this online."

Greed.

Telekinetics on strike...

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

Sure, it helps to be a blood-sucking parasite, but that's not all it takes to be a stockbroker...

'I beleive I have a new approach to psychotherapy, but, like everything else, the FDA tells me it first has to be tested on mice.'

"Of course I'm going to give him a tip - he should take lessons!"

"So, how's your scary movie?"

"Don't worry, Emily. . . I'm woke and you're woke, so I'm sure our baby will turn out woke!"

'Ants of all lands, unite!'

"Is your dog friendly?"

'Oh, honey, what a lovely house... We'll place the couch here, the cupboard there and my psychiatrist right here!'

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

'So, then.... you don't LIKE life in the fast lane?'

'Dear sir, thank you for your idea of a helicopter ejection-seat, but...'

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'