Fans Of Clever Satire Pillows

"Hey, that's what everyone thinks about the strategic planning department! I've got a crystal ball and we all study the occult! Hah Hah Hah!..."

Hollywood Sign Developers

Life is for the birds.

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

Cord cutter

'Due to government surveillance, is my allowance taxable?'

"...No it does state here quite clearly...the right to bear arms...not arm bears."

Joe's 'Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions' Bar.

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

"C'mon people! All for me and me for me!"

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

'It's a boy. He's healthy and coming along fine, but he may be a little crnkt at birth owing to his claustrophobia. He will have feminine tendencies but is not actually gay. In fact, he'll eventually develop a taste for hard liquor and trashy women...'

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

"She's a miniature."

'Does it bother anyone else that our entire business is based on one questionable product?'

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

Government Offices / In tray, No Exit tray.

'Who's the new guy?'

Centaur for Disease Control Says Wear a Mask

Standard & Poor

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

"It's trickle down."

"It's either the Ten Commandments or the Mueller Report."

Bureaucracy gone mad!

Jack in the box on strike.

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

"Neversource"

In my day, they didn

"Mr. Pope, please give this summons to your boss. The prosecutor wants to know how god can allow so much misery."

Hudibras - 2 - The manner how he sallies forth.

'I'm afraid we can't deliver your baby until your CRB check comes through.'

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."