Artful Interpreter Gifts

Art Gallery.

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

Dialogue

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

She - Interpreter - He.

Sock Puppet in Literature

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

Frederic Chopin

"Caricatures $20"

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

'Boss, it seems like a friendly text, but you've got to learn to read between the emoticons.'

How a poet works

"I've written the employees' benefit manual in invisible ink"

Signing the declaration of independence.

"To hear the ocean in English, press one. Para Espanol ..."

"I've learned to give up when I hear Brooklyn in your voice."

'It says here you can talk trash in five languages.'

Statue of Liberty

"Baldo, Gracie...you need to learn more Spanish. For the rest of the week, I'm going to speak nothing but Spanish, and Tia Carmen will act as your interpreter, OK? Tienen tarea?"

'I need a text-mail interpreter.'

Orator translates in many languages.

"Send for a Prftgxrgplwtkn interpreter - case adjourned for a thousand light years."

Sign on wall of spacious empty hall of museum: 'Air & Space Exhibit'

"I think our daughter should change her major. She can now ask for money in 3 different languages!"

'Typical phallic egocentrism!'

Interpreter for the hard-to-believe-what-they're-hearing.

Company spokespersons statement being interpreted into plane English by a second spokesman.

When I was in jail, I passed the time by writing my autobiography. I took certain liberties with some of the characters. For instance, you appear in the later chapters

Percentage artwork

Ferguson, Bramley, Osgood & Holt - Big Frogs in a Small Pond.

"You'll have to phrase it another way. They have no word for 'fetch.' "

'That's not in addition to your pension, that IS your pension.'

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

Simultaneous translation.