Art Conservation Gifts

'Poor thing. He got left out in the acid rain.'

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

Great Chinese Dynasties

"Hold it right there, ma'am! If you get too close to the artwork, I'll have to ask you to leave the gallery."

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

Paul Klee

The Environmentalist

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

Deforestation.

North Pole

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

Nature versus commerce.

"I think he was a celebrity."

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

reincarnated worm...

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

Homegrown solutions for a smaller carbon footprint.

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

'Humans & Lemmings have a lot in comon...'

It beached on a pile of plastic bottles, so they were able to just roll it back out.

Use your imagination.

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

"I love you too, big guy."