Arachnid Ally Pillows

'No spiders were harmed in the eradication of your cockroaches.'

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Yeah, it's funny, but you'll see, in this house, it's the guy who screams the loudest...

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

"You can’t just go up the waterspout whenever you hear something you don’t like!"

A violin spider and a saxaphone spider

Angler sees sign that says 'Good Spot'. He says, 'This looks like a good spot.'

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

Brown Non-Recluse Spider

Labrador for sale

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

"Of all my husbands I believe the first one tasted the best."

"Now, cover your second, fourth and seventh eyes and read the next line."

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

Blatant competition in nature.

'Aside from a crazed sheep now and then, this is a very risk-free profession.'

Dog hides eyes as car turns into vet clinic.

'Reallly Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!'

"I do appreciate that it eats other bugs, but it also ate my husband."

"What do I remember about my mother? Well, for starters, she was delicious."

'What luck!'

"Ninety days, catnip-free. I couldn't have done it without you."

"Arachnophunnies"

'I want to know where this relationship is going.'

Black Widow Diet

'Visit my website.'

'I'm sorry, but we are after a different kind of Web expert...'

'Your anger towards us can't be healthy, so we hope this intervention helps.'

'I'm sorry, but we are after a different kind of Web expert...'