Apprentice Aficionado Gifts

'Gerald loves firing Donald Trump!'

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"Meet the author"

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

Driverless cars rage.

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

Beer Stall

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

"What did you download at school today?"

'You learn how to make dough later. For now, you're on a knead-to-know basis.'

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'Yes, it computed the answer in a bilionth of a second and printed it instantly, but until I find my glasses...'

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."

Happy thoughts

Bot Art: After da Vinci

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."