Advisor Aficionado Gifts

'I think I've spotted our problem.' (too many consultants)

"I need some advice..."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"Meet the author"

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

'As our new company logo, I'm not quite sure it's sending out the right message.'

Create some buzz!

'If only every year was an election year.'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

Creative department

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

"Technically he's a zombie but we'll market him as a hybrid."

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

Important Food Groups

"Damnit, executive-trainees don't have 'accidents'."

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Driverless cars rage.

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

Unto thee shall pass the executive laser pointer. Take this authority and delegate it.

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

"What did you download at school today?"

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."