Applying For A Mortgage Gifts

'Ready?!'

Three little pigs-mortgage.

'When is a good time to get a mortgage?'

'Forget my mortgage application, fill this bag with money. I've decided to make a cash offer!'

'We're worried about your ability to lend us money.'

"Sign here please." "Scorpio?"

"I'm sorry if some of the 'affordability' questions we're require to ask may seem inappropriate."

"Lenders are a lot more cautious about 'interest free' mortgages these days. "

"The requirements are pretty rigid these days..."

Those who don't learn from the past are destined to relive it.

"The process of phoning lenders can be a little confusing..."

'Sorry, no, but thanks for bringing a little laughter into my life.'

'I decided to eliminate the middleman, and applied for a CHINESE mortgage.'

Mortgage Department: 'I don't suppose you're a transsexual or anything, are you? - The Government says we can only loan money to minorities now.'

"You've heard of 'The Bank that likes to say 'YES''. . . well we're the bank that likes to laugh in your face unless you've got an 80% deposit."

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

Standard & Poor

"If I'm such a poor risk, how did I get so deep into debt?"

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

Canine Comedians

"I'm a good risk for a business loan because I put 110% effort into my business."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"Their titles from left to right are, 'Holiday in Palm Springs','Next mortgage payment' and 'Deposit on a new Porsche'

"Well, Mr. Shoddy, if we were to approve your business loan, you'd really need to change the name of your company."

'Your mortgage is under water...so what's the problem?'

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

"What do you mean you wouldn't sweat the water in the basement."

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'