Starting A Mortgage Gifts

'I hope buying this house won't sink us.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

Three little pigs-mortgage.

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

"Their titles from left to right are, 'Holiday in Palm Springs','Next mortgage payment' and 'Deposit on a new Porsche'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

Financial Advisor. The next time you let your inner child out to play, don't let him play with your credit cards.

"I want to live in a neighborhood where I can walk around at night."

"What do you mean you wouldn't sweat the water in the basement."

'Your mortgage is under water...so what's the problem?'

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

I have a dream.

"Well Darling, there you go, our own bit of swamp: A perfect place to raise a family..."

"Lenders are a lot more cautious about 'interest free' mortgages these days. "

"You can huff and puff all you want. The house is foreclosed and belongs to the bank."

"Good morning - I'm from your bank. We'd like our house back please!"

Estate Agents: Executive Homes

"If the nanny state wants us to solve the housing crisis they need to get out of the way and let us learn from the leaders in the field..."

"Let us pray for the possessed...and the re-possessed"

'They're playing house.'

"This spectacular 40 room property has majestic views of the valley and village and it was tastefully renovated after the most recent Viking incursion."

"Well, it is a good property. The price is low because it is harder to negotiate due to its S-bend configuration."

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

"We both love Chinese food."

'Looks like you're underwater on your mortgage.'

'Ready?!'

"Whatever you do, keep up with your mortgage payments."

'Forget my mortgage application, fill this bag with money. I've decided to make a cash offer!'