Application Augmenter Gifts

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

Claus 2.0

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

Books: Soon to be made into a major computer App.

'Yes, it is large for a smart phone, but then it does do absolutely everything.'

"I'd like to toast our guests."

"What did you think of the encryption article?"

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

Robot arm shows charity to a laid off beggar.

Distributor in love with a multitasking robot.

Yahoo! What's that about? She got into the college of her choice. Which college is it? Not sure. She chose to apply to 37. West Fester High School.

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

Mad cleaning robot.

Data Extraction Social Media Theme Park

I've been told I can order a small mocha. Told? Because of my heart rate and activity level over the past seven days, I've been allotted a daily limit of 1,426 calories. I'm told that's just enough to include one small mocha. Hold on … there's vibrating ... Hold on ... hold on ... buffering ... Bing! Fitness overlords says I'm one calorie away from a medium mocha. It says yelling burns one calorie. I've got to get that app.

"I'm going to be late... my driverless car is stick behind an autonomous tractor."

'Isn't it great? It gives us four times the storage space as a regular fridge!'

"Ah! dehydrogenated non-milk fat solids with a soupcon of deoxyhydropesane and sweetners...just like mum used to make."

"I am your bot server. Page me by phone and tip me in bitcoins."

People were amazed by the dexterity of the automatic pizza-making machine.

"This robot barista is so authentic it even got my name wrong."

NOW HIRING, 'I don't have any formal training for the position, but I've read all the relevant Wikipedia articles.'

"What do you have that's bigger than 'king'?"

'When I teach you to fold laundry, wash day will be totally energy efficient... for me.'

'Hello - goodbye.'

'Your hard work and commitment have been crucial to this company's development, Thompson. Unfortunately, my nephew has just created an app for that.'

"Today we're filling out mock college applications."

'Please wait for idle chit-chat or insert payment now.'

'You'll need a better credit rating before we can give you a credit card?'

"I must admit, I thought I had seen every type of 'attention grabbing' resume out there, but this..."

'What made that candidate stand out?'

'Do I follow your highly educated, well-trained and expensive advice...or just use this app?'