Apple Cider Aficionado Gifts

Next time Fred goes shopping for Sparkling Cider he will wear his glasses so he can read the labels more carefully.

Apples for sale

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

Archimedes, Galileo, Copernicus

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

The Beer Garden of Eden: "This hard cider is life-changing. Try a sip."

Newton forgets gravity, discovers delicious apple

Tree Passion

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

Freaks of nature exhibit.

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

'Fried chickens.'

"Shower beers? Aisle eight."

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

Ascent of man from ape to beer swilling football lout.

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

'Would you say your glass is half empty or half full?' 'Whose round is it?'

"A trillion bottles of beer on the wall, a trillion bottles of beer..."

Aromatherapy for Men

The Endangered Species: Your Local Pub

'GM apples prevent Migraine'

"I like you because you have absolutely no agenda."

Rugby Players and Supporters Essential Supplies

"Where do you see yourself five beers from now?"

"We need to find another fall activity to do with the kids."

Body by Jake

'Remove the fur and claws and these genetically engineered apples taste just fine.'