Apocalyptic Thinker Gifts

'There goes Mr. Negativity.'

"The end is near."

"According to my readings, their civilization was already in decline and Frasier The Musical pushed it over the brink."

The End is Nigh.

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

"It's a good show, but I'm pretty sure it's a limited series."

"One day she'll be a wonderful architect."

"Would it have killed you to shave first?"

The End is Nigh

Cycles of evolution and destruction

'This isn't a BREAKTHROUGH, Colbert! This is a CIRCULAR REASONING! All you've done here is re-state our original objective.'

Hollywood ending.

"Given what passes as normal nowadays, I doubt I'd even recognize the apocalypse if it came."

The End Of The Week Is Coming!

Don't sweat the small stuff

'Today he was told about Global Warming.'

No Easy Answers

"We're having trouble getting a venue for our December 31st conference, all the staff are asking way too much money"

Professor Yomp inserts ecology into his economic formula: "We're doomed!"

"We offer a short-term high yield bond fund that may fit your particular investing priorities."

"I hate to say I told you so!"

'Which stocks should I invest in to profit from this 'Armageddon' you keep talking about?'

'This has given me a great idea for a novel.'

"Have you tried ringing the help desk?"

"Now remember not to give away the big surprise!"

The end is near.

"Do you suppose there's life under other rocks?"

"People won't take you seriously with all of the smiley faces on it."

'I wonder what they're waiting for.'

Future world records

'A Major Doomsday Event Is Nigh'

"I think the return of the pterodactyls is a little ominous!"