Apocalypse Philosopher Gifts

Don't sweat the small stuff

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"The end of my favorite series is near."

Coronavirus

"When I was your age, we wished on stars. Now, we wish on satellites!"

'God?' Earth receives its first transmission from space.

"It's a good show, but I'm pretty sure it's a limited series."

"We've all said things about heliocentricity that look bad when taken out of context."

Zombie Problems

"They're very time-sensitive."

'Good. Then there's no reason to stay on this diet any longer.'

"Shall we put it in play?"

"I'll have dessert first."

"What, then, is theorigin of cosmology? Some say it has always been with us and always will be. Some think it arrived spontaneously, while others feel it started very small and is expanding..."

"Has anyone seen my therapist?"

Prepper Dog

Eviction Notice for Earth...

"What the hell happened to this town?"

'I was on my way to Heaven, when they stumbled across my blog...'

The End of the World is Nigh - man with placard

'The big bang theory of creation.'

"Kind of makes you realize how insignificant my awesome beard is."

"Since I got out here, it seems my mind is like it's in a vacuum."

"Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about that?"

"I don't think so."

The Future

Sun crashing into sea foils rescue attempt.

End of world nigh!!!

"The season finale of the world is near."

'I know just how you feel. Sometimes I think I'm living on the wrong planet too.'