Anxiety Humor Enthusiasts Pillows

Room 101 Tax Inspection

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

Food chain.

Agoraphobic Explorer

Safe harbour

"Since I heard there was a monster I can't sleep at night!"

'Dinner for two, table for seven.'

"He's socially awkward but brilliant in his field."

'Has the news finished yet?'

"I sleep poorly anyway, so you might as well put me in high-risk investments."

"The feel of mud and weeds between my toes just really freaks me out."

'He has a doctorate in worrying.'

Why hamsters don't sleep at night.

'And why do you think you developed this overwhelming fear of couches?'

'I'm shaking a bit!'

Pre-minstrel Tension.

'It's only hypochondria, but it's a very virulent FORM of it.'

Bubbie's parrot

"If anything happens, Janice, I love you."

People go out of their way to hurt me phobia: 'Believe me, Carpenter, when I fired you I didn't have the faintest idea it was your birthday.'

"Well, the MRI confirms it: you have a shy bladder."

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles - we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts!'

A man's head disappears into his torso, replaced by a sign that reads: Next Showing 1:00

"Before we begin, would you like a prozac?"

Maximum Insecurity Prison

"I think the man in the corner may have the covid."

Danger

"My apologies, sir. Our chef forgot to take his beta-blocker."

'You seem much better since they upped my medication.'