Anxiety Humorist Pillows

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

"If anything happens, Janice, I love you."

First he felt pride, then confusion, then the terrible doubts began to seep in,,, had he forgotten, once again, to tell Darryl they were going to play hide and seek

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

Why hamsters don't sleep at night.

"Since I heard there was a monster I can't sleep at night!"

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"Why the gumboots? Well, I can't stand slimy things touching my feet..."

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

T-Shirt reads: 'Out of mind, I won't be back.'

"Outta my way. I need to check my email!"

"First you leave me in the waiting room for two hours before I can see you... then you tell me I've got to watch my blood pressure!"

'Look at you. You're a basket case.'

"Now, let’s talk about your attachment issues."

'Do you know how much it cost me to LEARN all this psychobabble?'

"Most people would jump at an opportunity like this."

"Legally, I have the right to talk as slowly and boringly about all your options as I want."

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

Man Gives Computer Therapy/

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

'Actually, I'm a placebo psychiatrist.'

"Are we sexually compatible? Well, we both get headaches at the same time..."

Superhero with Acrophobia

"So, Michael, any pesticidal thoughts today?"

Fakir Shrink.

Psychobabble.

"Therapist: Six couches no waiting"

"Every now and then, I get an overpowering urge to wear a cowbell."

A man jumps out of a window to avoid an injection.

Agoraphobic Explorer

Shrink's Summer Job

'Dinner for two, table for seven.'