Anti-morning Person Gifts

Alarm clock.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

Bird Tweet.

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"You're new here ... it's customary on dismal Monday mornings to be miserable."

'I hate Mondays.'

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

'Get up and put your house slippers on! - You'll be late for home school!'

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

Alarmistclock

'I'll set snooze for an extra month.'

"This is their 'Working Mother of Four' coffee special. They must know what I go through."

"It's time to wake up!"

"I AM following doctor's orders. He told me to cut back to one cup a day...right?!"

Early Morning Roll Call.

'Are you sure it's non-drowsy? I cannot afford to oversleep...'

"The early bird may get the worm, but the late bird gets delicious table scraps."

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

"I'm glad you like this new brand of coffee, Joni. The label said "fast-acting," but who knows what that means!"

Rooster

"That's not the morning paper, Storm. That's a subpoena."

"I have to get up for school early and my alarm clock is broken."

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

'Normally, I enjoy a morning when the birds are singing.'

Room service.

'I like waking to music!'

Scientific Research: 'Does your research on the sunset include the observation of the sunrise?'

Mans breakfast makes a 'Snap, crackle, pop' sound. He hears his dog's food making a 'Woof, growl, yelp' sound.

"I think I'll be wicked today and skip Anthony Lewis."

I realize I'm scarier in the middle of the night, but I was always such a morning person.

'Don't worry, have a nice holiday, I'll cover for you: Once cockadoodledoo at sunrise, any idiot can do that!'

Just Because it's Tuesday

"I'm not getting out of bed. What's the point? Things keep getting worse every day. Even my toothbrush depresses me... I'll just continue sleeping until the world comes to its senses." "Amen."