Anniversary Forgetters Gifts

'In defense of forgetting our anniversary, I forgot we're married.'

man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Do You Know It's Anniversary

"Can you remember the general shape of our car?"

'I forgot to cancel the milk!'

An old man and women are driving along with a 'Still married' sign on their car.

'They were going to get married when they were young, but he kept forgetting the wedding date!'

'You can stop looking-I just remembered I didn't wear my retainer today. Funny, huh?'

"Over the long haul, it's been a long haul."

"We're celebrating our 25th anniversary, so separate checks."

"Don't tell me I forgot me toothbrush again."

'How do you expect me to remember. . . when every year you look younger?'

"The occasion? Oh—that would be the fifth anniversary of our never having got married because of an earlier experience of yours that had nothing to do with me."

"Birthday? No? Anniversary?

"And so it begins... Now where'd I put my dang glasses..."

'I gave you life and you forget my birthday.'

'That reminds me must buy an anniversary present for Lady Caroline!!'

"This is where the party budget ran out."

'I know yesterday was your birthday, but you're so hard to shop for.'

'You remembered our anniversary!'

'This is the 1927 Georges de Latour you bought us for our anniversary, son. Mom spruced it up nicely with orange soda and melon balls.'

"I still can't believe that you've booked a table for two on our anniversary you old romantic!"

'Nope, a handmade coupon for 'one free backrub' ain't gonna cut it for our 25th Wedding Anniversary hon...'

'Hey, honey, remember when I told you to expect a big surprise on our anniversary? Well, I snuck off to go hunting with Cliff - SURPRISE!'

'He drinks to forget and today it's our wedding anniversary.'

'...gone! The remains of the iceberg that sank the Titanic, to...'

Uncle Mort, I've been at this cafe for 20 years. It's my anniversary. So you're still employed? Yeah, I mean, yeah, of course you know tha … No thanks to greedy corporate interests! They've moved jobs and cash offshore, avoided paying taxes, spurred public policy that destroys the middle class! My anniversary gift: Your spit. I yell because I care.

A slap-up meal.

"That reminds me...Happy valentine."

'Of course I remembered. What is the traditional gift for a 25th wedding anniversary - steak or lobster?'

'We were playing mothers and fathers and I forgot our wedding anniversary.'

Three Unwise Men

'Next week will be our Silver Wedding Anniversary!'

Ask Sadie. Sadie, my wife deserves so much more than I can give her. What can I buy her for our upcoming 36th wedding anniversary? - Wayne. *Actual reader letter. The 36th wedding anniversary? Isn't that wood paneling? What? First is paper, second is cotton, third is leather, and so forth. But wood paneling? Stucco? She has no clue. But she intuits these are the remodeling years.

"And they said it would never last."

Man forgeting anniversary