Animal Worshipper Pillows

'It's a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. I had it specially made for my hospital.'

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Drool Marks

Vishnu playing twin neck guitar.

Pyramid catflap...

"Communion at the contemporary service is scones and coffee."

'But, apart from the pews, the sermon, the hymns, the coffee and, 'all that praying', you'd come again?'

"And the Lord he sayeth 'doest thou thinkest I knoweth not who sniggereth at the back there?'"

'In ancient Egypt, cats were treated like gods and in this house, it's pretty much the same: Come in friend...'

"No thank you - The people who live here, worship me. . !!"

"Our cat is the only god this home needs."

"Sosa's great, but McGwire is my hero."

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'

'Did you know that your birthmark links to a cult group that worships cats?'

"You're not a goat person?"

"Finished feeding the 5000. What do you want to do with the left over fish?"

"If God wanted me to go to church he wouldn't have put football on Sundays."

Rabbits popping out of holes on a hillside.

"My cat is like your god. Except people don't kill in her name. You don't need to wait until you die to meet her. And she's real."

'As a professional discount, I require you to say only two hail Marys.'

'Mom! Can my role model stay for dinner? He's suspended for three games and has nowhere to go.'

"Snowman 1 to snowman 3... UPS delivery complete... FedEx approaching fast... Amazon not in sight... Over!"

Cat is Ruler of the House.

'I'm writing everything off for religious reasons since I worship the dollar.'

Man says: 'Either that cat goes or I go.'