Animal Welfare Advisor Gifts

'Rasputin has been declawed: Pass it on...'

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

Brian was very proud of his dog.

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Support group for sheep.

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

dog vs UFO...

"Be kind"

Armstrong, the only doctor covered in the new health plan you got me is a veterinarian! Beats no coverage. Yeah, if you're a parakeet. You're so cheap. You don't value me at all. You ingrate. I didn't have to give you health benefits. Lots of employers don't cover their animals. You mean workers. Stop your barking.

The Golfing Accident

I'm not saying I'm not a hound dog. I'm saying I'm not nothing but a hound dog.

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

"I've told you why I need a dog. Now suppose you tell me what makes you think you might be that dog."

Should've been routine. That was before the dog called and offered to pay twice as much to have the master put down.

City Electronics and Computers...On sale...ROBOT PETS: 'Robot pets is going too far

Zoo: No Hunting.