Animal Pun Collector Gifts

The Bear Fax.

"The reason they are called lions son, is becuase they are always 'lion' around."

"Did you dial the rabbit response line?"

A Butt Ox

the dreaded Testes Fly...

Dear thaint Patrick you no drive me away, pleath no drive thnake anywhere. Danger noodle get car-thick.

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

Fist Bumper Cars

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

Pete would never forget the time he saw his very first nasal hare.

This man is an island.

'Oi! You threw that on Porpoise!'

"Doc, you'll be glad to know I'm comfortable in my own skin today. I shed my old in the reception room."

'You're the watchdog. Do you honestly expect us to believe you didn't see anything?'

Vet to owner about dog with bird at chest: 'I suspect heartworm.'

"Leapfrog is the latest craze among the kids, but experts say it contribute to declining birthrates. Find out why � after the break!"

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

Australian Mobile Bar

Racketeer

Bell Hop

"This isn't what I had in mind, when you said you were going to buy me some waterfront property."

"Butt cracker"

"The deal looks cut and dried to me but Haskins smells a rat."

Spiv

'Look, I don't want any funny business.'

Doctor to man with baseball player and footbal player on feet: 'You have a bad case of athlete's foot.'

It's just not going to work. I'm looking for a mole with more tunnel vision.

"So, according to your resume, you're willing to work for dog food."

'I get a lot of job offers..'

"Like most of your proposals Pinkley ...it ain't gonna fly!"