Funny Pun Collector Gifts

Bell Hop

"I warned him that his laptop was overheating and that he should get it fixed."

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

Fist Bumper Cars

Ms. Rusmore

Pete would never forget the time he saw his very first nasal hare.

"There are two ways we can go here - bark or bite."

This man is an island.

'Do we have any alligator pears?'

"How much did it cost to have your ears pierced?"

"Actually, 'Loss of Limb' would be covered under your homeowners policy."

How Romans give each other a high five...

"Why do you call the new sheepdog Bra?"

"The moment he told me he lived in a lighthouse, I knew he was a keeper."

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

The Bear Fax.

Artichoking victim

"Unplug and chill out."

Racketeer

"The are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't."

"Butt cracker"

Spiv

"Every five minutes it's 'feed me this, get me that' or something along those lines, I mean, I'm parrot-phrasing."

"Something that makes me look unfit for human consumption."

"It started with a few grey hares in my 20's and they kept showing up."

Doctor to man with baseball player and footbal player on feet: 'You have a bad case of athlete's foot.'

'I guess it's true what they say: spirits just don't mix'

"I feel a lot of societal pressure to be happy."

"Sorry, boss, but I'd like to take a leaf of absence."

Referee - That's a foul !

Mensa Applicants - Please Form an Orderly IQ.

That's what I call Flour Power!

Burning and Rotting In Hell Desk Organisers

Baroquin' around the Christmas Tree