Animal Peace Advocate Gifts

'Guarding the house was alright, but I left him when he wanted me to become an attack dog...'

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

Brian was very proud of his dog.

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

Support group for sheep.

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

"Tallyho!"

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

'We don't want you poking around here any more!'

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

Armstrong, the only doctor covered in the new health plan you got me is a veterinarian! Beats no coverage. Yeah, if you're a parakeet. You're so cheap. You don't value me at all. You ingrate. I didn't have to give you health benefits. Lots of employers don't cover their animals. You mean workers. Stop your barking.

Yeah, I know what you're talking about: humans have an unhealthy interest in my horn too...

dog vs UFO...

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

"Be kind"

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'