Animal Documentaries Gifts

'Day 57. The tigers appear to be adjusting to my presence.'

"I've been in three documentaries, but I've never been nominated."

Birdwatchers watching a bird documentary.

"They've been walking like this since they watched that documentary on elephants."

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

Live Stream

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

Crocodile

Next camera crew 5 mins

Police film evidence

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

They're watching a documentary about safety razors. Sounds like a Schick flick!

Michael Moore creates a UK equivalent of Fahrenheit 9/11

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

Cinéma Vérité

Top Secret/Middle Secret/Bottom Secret

A penguin's life is like endless summer camp, swimming and fishing all day every day!

'Come on, you're telling me that you don't watch the Discovery Channel.'

A typical Monday. Zombie truck driving maniacs! South Pole penguin love! That's a stupid eco-friendly chick documentary! Insipid, mindless, violent, zombie crud! Negotiations commence, nearly a week before date night. Wimp! Blockbuster head!

"Ugh! Stop making a drama documentary out of a molehill."

'Phoor...watch these sperm whales at it...ah...yes..yes...'

"But what's my motivation?"

Poor vs Rich

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

Fahrenheit 911.

Diana Inquest - 'It's time to move on, and start making a TV mini-series of her life.'

A fly on the wall documentary.

Professor Brian Cox

Michael Moore

"Those pervs from the nature channel are filming us again."

"He's the exception: a fly on the wall who made it big in blockbuster movies."

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

'Hey! - why bicker all evening when we could be watching a film about ideological genocide.'