Animal Dialogue Appreciators T-Shirts

"You're not gonna be around much longer, pal, so do you mind if I eat your nose when you're done with it?"

'It's a great film Pauline, I nearly milked myself laughing.'

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

Dogs Must Be On A Leash.

"Give it up—Frisbee is your game."

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

"We've known each other for years Bob, and this grooming style suited you when you were young, but it's time to let it go!"

"Well, geez, you don't need to bite my hea.."

"I started out eating homework. Now I shred documents."

'I'm asking for a transfer to California because that's where you get the really good stuff.'

'Oh, I'm not looking for Gold, I'm checking for bear-traps...'

'Oh, that is so simplistic. Why must you always see the world in black and white?'

'I told you, never utter that four letter work - 'walk!''

'I've thought the same thing myself. He certainly doesn't look like any of us.'

"I could have been man's best friend but who needs the pressure."

"It's gonna be hard but no more shaking and fetching for a few weeks."

"Yeah, I tried beaver once too, but I didn't like the woody after-taste..."

"Cool hat, Walter. Where'd you get it?" "It came with the meal."

Dogs discussing human commend pet peeves.

'He's a nice guy, but he doesn't bite, if you know what I mean.'

"Sure, you can talk the talk, but can you swim the swim?"

"Are those the DNA results?" "Yep." "And?" "You're a dog."

'Look at that crazy cowboy, Butch, he's talking to his horse!'

"Lean Beef"

'I pose as a concerned citizen, but actually I couldn't miss the golden marmoset if it did become extinct.'

"Hello? Sharon? Just to let you know that I'm working from home today."

'Maybe we can work out an arrangement if you promise to take me to Disneyland.'

Catsplaining: Actually, Jerry, cats need to eat seven times a day to stay healthy

"I wish you'd shut that door! - Were you born in a barn??"

"Let's stop pretending we understand the English setters and just turn on the subtitles."

"Please. Please just stop barking."

'Great. Nice going. Right in the water.'

'What? You want something? It has something to do with your food dish? Darn, I wish dogs could talk!'

"Here comes crazy old cousin Harriett, who scratches in all the wrong spots."