Animal Character Aficionado Pillows

'Not only the slot in the back is considered offensive to my people. It's that, given the times, we don't want to be associated with your line of business.'

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

"I'm in children's books, myself."

My Spam Sketchbook

Canine Comedians

"Boss, can you check the address again? I have a bad feeling about this one."

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

'There's more to me than my books, you know.'

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

Nutty Assistants

Follow England mate, they're always crap!

'After the big race the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

'I don't think they are playing with a full deck.'

Mr. Hyde writing the unauthorized autobiography of Dr. Jekyll

'I keep hearing a buzzing in my ears.'

Pussycat says to Owl: 'This is rubbish, can we PLEASE do Ibiza next year?'

'The secret of my business success? Well, "Charge Ahead" I would guess...'

"What's this I hear about you eating your secretary?"

Cats 'Playing' Cards

'Before I met you, I didn't know any of the sitcom characters by their first names,'

Rich Cow: 'Gareth Gates'

"As I call each of your names, please answer by saying 'Present'"

A cat is a dog in drag...'Bad dog!'

"Jack and Nina's concern grew when their son, James, confided in them that his imaginary friend was, in fact, a short-tempered snapping turtle."

"All you have to do is get three of your friends, to get three of their friends and so on. You'll be rich."

"Nobody wants to hang out with Bedbug Man."

'You just go out on the lot and mark the tree you want.'

"Bond – James bond."

"What can I say? God made me this way!"

"And remember to always keep an eye on the sparrow"

And that's why I'm still single!

'And whatever happened to 'as quiet as a mouse'?'

"Is it too late for me to go back to the old ladies bike basket?"