Animal Behaviorist At Heart Gifts

Heel, sir!

"I'm giving up chasing my own tail..."

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

"Why do they do that?"

"Cat box"

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

"Lucky, I Said Heel!"

"Will you be taking these home or chewing them right here?"

"The hyenas started it."

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

Bears catching fish

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

"First date hairball... awkward."

"Sure my wings flap 70 times per second-- I've been sipping nectar all day."

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

"I think the ants are mooning me again."

Cat tries to reach a birdfeeder on stilts.

"I sure hope there's something good in here. I worked up quite an appetite getting past that raccoon-proof lid."

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

What does aloof mean?

"No wonder they've spotted us! Tail down Fred, tail down!"

'We don't want you poking around here any more!'

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

Cats = Zen, Dogs = Men