Animal-assisted Therapy Gifts

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

"Are you crazy? I can’t tell her that!"

"The patient in 12-C needs comforting."

'Relax, sir. He's a Border Colie - smartest of all breeds!'

But it's the other leg that hurts.

"But why can't I bring him to class? He's my therapy toad!"

"Rescue someone; rescue yourself"

"It's nice to be wanted."

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

"Have you got one that's a bit more pessimistic?"

So You Finally Caught Your Tail

"He never sniffs my butt anymore."

I hear you, man. Look, if you need anything, my door is always open.

'Animal Psychiatrist' (a dog).

"I'm referring you to another therapy dog."

"Cat got your tongue?"

'I'm sure he thinks he's a parrot!'

"I'm sensing that the role-playing homework I gave you didn't work."

"That's Roger's therapy dog."

'See what I mean, Doc?'

"You really are one hell of a therapy dog."

"I bark a lot, sure. But it's not like I couldn't quit if I really wanted to."

'Now tell me about your puppyhood.'