Angel Admirers Pillows

"It was better before God took up knitting."

"Oh, that's the problem - it was unplugged the whole time!"

'You seem to meet all the qualifications, but I'll still need to see you parallel park.'

"That wasn't there this morning!"

'My money's still working, only now it's working for my ungrateful children.'

An angel's halo is held up by a devil's tail.

'Wouldn't you know it? -- I sliced it right into Purgatory!'

'It's still hard to believe that we'll never have to go to the bathroom again!'

'Could you shinny up toward the middle, Bill?'

'You were in the mafia? Sorry, admission denied - on orders of the Pope.'

"They call this heaven? 10,000 channels of religious programming."

"There must have been a mid-air collision."

"I croaked. How about you?"

Angel despairs as she watches man write a poem.

"It looks like everything is made out of memory foam these days."

"How can you be out of wings?"

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

Snow Devil

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

"Seriously, just pull my finger ..."

Shrinks in heaven

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

"Actually, I think you looked better WITH a beard."

'My husband? -- He went to the theologically-challenged place.'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'Look man, no wings!'