Ancient Wonders Gifts

Stonehens

Pyramid (Drawn from memory) (Pretty accurate)

Sphinx with nursing Sphinx pups

"Well. . . either it's sinking, or you got the measurements wrong. . .!"

Down With Wikipedia

"I get it!"

"Thousands of years from now, men will marvel at this and wonder how we did it."

"Of course I'm building another one Dummy! It's a New Year, we need a new calendar!"

'I'm no expert but at a guess I'd say they had the drawings upside down!'

"See...polystyrene!"

"They ruin the landscape!"

Stonehenge Imitation

History Department

'Remember - when Daylight Saving Time ends, we have to give everything a slight turn to the left.'

Stoics vs. Epicureans.

'Tut, you've outdone yourself this time.'

Pyramid Pull-a-Long

"I'm afraid we don't think you're really henge material."

"OK, who's the joker?"

"Change of plan. We decided to go with a material that doesn't spoil so quickly."

'It was built by the ancients as a calendar. We know because each pillar has a kitten doing something really cute carved on it!'

Archeologists found a set of 9.7-million-year-old teeth in Germany that might belong to a primitive relative of early man. Totally unrelated question: Are you missing any teeth, Sadie. That's funny. Speaking of which, there are many ways a person could lose teeth. Threats of violence aren't funny in 2018. That's like a rule. A good pummeling never hurt anyone.

'What do you think of as you great achievements?'

The Hanging Gardens of Shoreham

Spudhenge

'The time? Yes, it's VII ... no, hang on, er ... IX ... uh ... oh, for God's sake, it's half nine, OK?'

'It's a fantastic design, but I'm worried that after the games it'll just end up as a useless load of stone with no legacy potential.'

King: 'I said build me a stone HENGE you FOOL! NOT stone HENS!!'

'WHO is the architect here?'

'We've laid it out so that twice a year the sun's rays will penetrate all the way back to the throne and smack him right between the eyes.'

The Original Stonehenge: '...it's just that I hate all the effort to alter the clock twice a year.'

"It'll be up to the markets to decide how important a discovery this is."

Plato

'Are they called 'pyramids' because the Pharaoh used a pyramid scheme to finance them?'

"There are Druids and there are Druids."