Ancient Allure Enthusiast Gifts

"Well, it certainly explains why everyone's so nice!"

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Neptune

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

Antiques

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

Souvenirs.

'We met through a radiocarbon dating service.'

'Gee, I just never get tired of this!'

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

Romans.

'Anti-Graffito' worker about to erase hieroglyphics.

Teddy Roosevelt

"No flash in the ancient mummy gallery."

"Wow, Grog, fire and drawings. This is quite an entertainment center you have here."

'Whoa...let's not get ahead of ourselves here, Al...'

"Greece! Greece! Greece! Every day it's the same! Just the constant Greece!"

Books of Tablets

Antiques

Orpheus and Eurydice

"I'm still looking, sir?"

Authentic Rinkelmier chair (Built 1723)

"Tut's outdone himself this time."

Greek in gallery with Greek statues

410 BC: The Roman empire begins its slide into decadence.

"Surely, as the world's only superpower, we're entitled to a little mischief now and then."

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

'That's a bad omen no sooner does he invent the wheel than he has the first ever road traffic accident.'

"The horse is nice, but we could really use the blender."

'Behold! The curse of the pharaoh!'

Mangle

The Old Curiosity Shop

'We met at an archaeological dig, in Egypt.'