Analog Appreciator Gifts

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"Sorry, grandpa, but wiggling the antenna won't restore your cable and Internet."

"Now, I'm ready for summer."

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

"Amazon's new A.I. just 'gets' me."

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

The very noisy, but enjoyable game of Crowquet.

Man has thrown his computer aside and is writing on a typewriter.

"My kid could do that."

"Yes, we still love print, don't we?"

2 Ohm and 4 Ohm Amps,

'If you don't want to go digital, fine, but if you're going to store film in our cooler you have to save room some soda and beer."

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

'To be totally honest, our ship of matrimony is taking on water.'

'But Miss, I've only just got the hang of 'the little hand' and 'the big hand'...'

"Some clean room - there's a fly in my potassium nitrate."

"I don't care if you whistle while you work, but others find it disconcerting."

"This won't work, Josh. I'm bottled water. You're tap."

'Real Sex is consensual non-cyber + includes conversation.'

Non-Digital Content Delivery Devices

A toaster plays fetch

VINYL HISS

Buzz buzz. Beekeeper. Beep beep. Key beeper.

"I don't know a damn thing about art, but my back hasn't felt this good in years."

"In case of emergency, do you know how to work a pencil?"

Perpetual Motion.

Woman putting correction fluid on a computer screen

You have to admit, For He's a Jolly Good Fellow is a defense that's pretty hard to deny.

"Enjoy your youth. Soon you'll be an old cynic like me with nothing worth barking at."

You'll see, Chet; sales will pick up as soon as this whole Internet fad blows over.'

"The fact that you're writing your presentation in giant letters makes me think you still haven't figured out how to use a PowerPoint presentation."

"He's one of my favourites. You feed him milk and cookies and he gives you a present."

"I prefer the texture of printed books."

Yeah, I get it, it's hot - but you don