Analog Ace Gifts

"Classical guitar hero"

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

A Bloody Butcher

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

'Would everyone please phrase their questions in ones and zeros please.'

Whack-a-molecule

"Look, honey, I got dinner on line!"

"You need to take this thingamajig...and attach it to the whatchamacallit using a turny thing."

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

The AdRams Family no.13 - Exams

"Nice design but you haven't quite mastered the technology!"

Man has thrown his computer aside and is writing on a typewriter.

'Come on, come on! Bite! Oh, man... He's looking right at it!!'

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

"Yes, we still love print, don't we?"

"I'm recommending more video games. I'm worried about his hand eye coordination."

'If you don't want to go digital, fine, but if you're going to store film in our cooler you have to save room some soda and beer."

'Stupido Digitale! Chucka me a sloppy brush, there's a gooda chap.'

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

Books and Phones

Life Is Just A Game

"It's called a mobile... but I've been here an hour and have yet to see it move."

'That's funny - the computer said we had mail..'

'But Miss, I've only just got the hang of 'the little hand' and 'the big hand'...'

"Dear diary, I'm leaving you for a Twitter account—it's not you, it's technology..."

If you think you have caught a record fish...make sure you have a witness...

"Top quality line, expert knot, expensive lure: Now, that's how you recognise a Sport Fisherman..."

'My, doesn't time fly? I can hardly believe it's been a year since you last forgot our anniversary!'

'Real Sex is consensual non-cyber + includes conversation.'

"I had that James Herriot bloke in the back of my cow the other day..."

"In case of emergency, do you know how to work a pencil?"

"Actually write thank-you notes to my best customers with a pen and paper? But I wouldn't have spell check!"