Amateur Herpetologist Gifts

"He gives me the creeps. I Think it's love."

Oh no, not again!

"Hang on a minute: Aren't these a bit too big to be turtle eggs?"

Is it true you can get high licking some frog?

'Could I get flies with that?'

Race you across the lake!

"I caught a snapping turtle. I hope you're not sitting on him."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

'You and Rags working together make great dinosaur finders.'

"Yup, pretty sure that was a flying squirrel."

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

"He is throwing another of his 'hissy fits' again!"

"It's a beautiful world out there, just waiting to be discovered. Well, discovered by one of you, the rest will almost certainly die."

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

'That's far enough for the first trip -- gather some soil samples and initiate re-entry procedures.'

'Don finally figured out a way to keep the squirrels from getting at the bird feeder.'

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

"I can tell it's new because it's alive."

“If they were huggers like us they would have evolved useful arms.”

Snake Eyes

"Doc, you'll be glad to know I'm comfortable in my own skin today. I shed my old in the reception room."

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

'Well doctor that will be the Mabato Tree Snake.'

Reinventing the Wheel

Keep it on until he's gone. They still think we're extinct.

Ricochet

Snake with 'toxic' sign around it's neck.

"How do you spell, asteroid?"

"You've been in long enough! Two more dives then out!"

'This 'Palestine' place you're giving to us - Will we have the mineral rights?'

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

"We both need to get away and unsidewind awhile."

"I guess we shouldn't have called him Monty."