Album Collector T-Shirts

Urban fox.

'Chief, the pale-face wants you to listen to his latest album of industrial goth metal.'

"Sergeant Pepper's lonely, depressed and neurotic hearts club band"

Buy My Album

Devil has the best tunes

"The best money spinner in the world...ever!"

Jazz is Invented

Scene from 'Night of the Koala'

'You never met my father? Never mind, I'm turning into him!'

Six jazz instruments.

Large print rock'n'roll section

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

DVD extras - the making of the boxed set.

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

Viola, cello, 1st violin and 2nd violin vending machine.

Tiny jazz musicians play large drum and bass.

'I hope this DVD has some worthwhile in-front-of-the-scenes content.'

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

'Music & Gym'

'Nobody pays for music anymore.'

Beatlemania: Open 24/8

"I picked up an exorcize DVD by mistake."

"I feel that what would really give your next album a major boost would be some kind of well-publicized personal problem."

Gramaphone Man.

At the Goldilocks Music Store albums are labeled: 'Too Many Notes,' 'Too Few Notes,' 'Too loud,' 'Too Soft,' and 'Just Right.'

Islington Angels.

"The harmonica! Boy you're lucky, my cowboy plays the double-bass! I tell you what, it's a pretty awkward thing to carry around..."

"Arr! Why is the quality of all me DVDs so crappy?"

"What the hell's going on here ... ?"

'Can I have a refund if she puts the weight back on.'

Baroque Bach Mountain

"Joel Daniels: Live from behind the CVS"

'I traded a motherboard for three DVD's. They were bogus, so I tossed them out the window....'