Agricultural Official T-Shirts

"We need money - where - Oh, where, will we get the money? Where?"

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

View to the Future

'I had to overcome stereotypical misunderstandings about who makes a good leader.'

"Can I call you back? I've got a situation here."

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

Farmers' Warnings.

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

"There's a big green giant at the door!"

'Thanks to a little genetec engineering, we can merchandise these fish right on the farm.'

"Jersey Tomatoes" vs. "Jersey toMAHtoes"

"Well, we can kiss being free-range goodbye."

The Shepherd's Staff. . .

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

'With all the new laws being proposed, our tomatoes with founder genes may soon be an endangered species.'

Man rolling the world across a shaky bridge between organic food and genetic food.

Disraeli's Local Taxation Reform for Agricultural Interest

"I can't afford to feed you."

'Is it ok if I just bring in some of our carpet?'

Desk of an urban farm manager

"OK, today, Bob, your team is on blackberry clearing at the Brown's farm, while Lisa, your team is on thistle clearing at the Barker's farm..."

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

'I don't know if she's gonna be much good. I don't think she's even registered.'

"Are your chickens raised without the use of growth hormones?"

Contaminated eggs? No problem at all!

Farmer Joe's soybean maze never caught on

'Help! I think I'm going to be fertilized!'

'These were developed in the 1980s - they're a heritage genetically modified variety.'

"Whatever happened to common sense?"

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

"We quickly realized it was fruitless trying to compete, so now we work together and sell blended wool..."

"...and the farmers - what would they do without me?...wait, don't answer that!"

How Guinea Pigs are made.

Tom Cotton