Agrarian Jokester Gifts

You certainly have a way with chickens.

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

It's an autobiography of a guy who spent his whole life trying to get his first @#^& book published. Editor.

'That GMO gene salesman was darn right!'

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

Clandestine cows.

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

Hey there! I thought you guys were extinct!

'I finnaly located what was causing that hissing sound on the tractor.'

When Farmer Harry Met Farmer Sally.

'Well, you always said you wanted a water feature for the garden.'

Gardener digging and finding pipes.

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

Scottish Independence: The Union Jock.

They're Brazillian!

Yes, the salad was vegan. In fact, we even offered it first to all the bunnies in the area, each of whom insisted that, no, he was quite full, and he'd like you to have it.

COWS: Spare cow

Experimental Free Range Guinea Pigs For Sale.

'Is it my imagination, or has this suddenly become harder to push?'

'AAAAH! MILK LEECH!'

'That's a definite 'no' to us being a zombie then?'

'Tender and Juicy.'

"It's a brovella about my life in the frat. But if it's longer than two hundred pages it becomes a brahvel."

'The fruiter surmised that the zineb caused catface.'

"No matter who I vote for, Tia Carmen always votes for the other guy. That means my candidate gets two votes!"

"Oh lord, I think we're in a Japanese horror movie!"

"Now that we've got a new bull, is he the calve's stepfather?"

"An olive or a twist?"

Summer Reading