Aging With Grace Supporter Gifts

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"Your contents have shifted."

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

Multi-Generational Books

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

Old Karate Master

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

"I noticed a few browns."

Snail Pattern Balding.

Aging Problems

"As the years go by, and my hair recedes, I comb my parting with such sweet sorrow."

"Sitting on a beanbag doesn't take me back to the seventies- it just makes me wonder how I'm ever going to get up again."

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"I come from the future."

"It's too late for a nose job and too early for a face-lift."

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

"I'm pretty sure the middle-aged upper-arm jiggle is the one thing there's not a niche market for."

"Losing your fizz is very common for a man your age."

"Well, Dr. Garcia said he's doing all he can, but he can't make me any younger. But I don't care about getting younger. I just want to keep getting older."

A very fine vintage

Introducing Life Alarm for people who have fallen but don't want to get up.

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

A senior moment.

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

'I hate to break this to you, Clark, but your buns of steel have turned to jello.'

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."