Aging With Grace Supporter Gifts

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"Your contents have shifted."

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

Multi-Generational Books

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

Old Karate Master

"We REALLY do get better with age."

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

Snail Pattern Balding.

Aging Problems

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

"I noticed a few browns."

"Sitting on a beanbag doesn't take me back to the seventies- it just makes me wonder how I'm ever going to get up again."

"As the years go by, and my hair recedes, I comb my parting with such sweet sorrow."

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"I come from the future."

"Well, Dr. Garcia said he's doing all he can, but he can't make me any younger. But I don't care about getting younger. I just want to keep getting older."

"It's too late for a nose job and too early for a face-lift."

"I'm pretty sure the middle-aged upper-arm jiggle is the one thing there's not a niche market for."

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

"Nice try, but I don't think whisky counts as an 'essential medication'."

"Losing your fizz is very common for a man your age."

A very fine vintage

'They want your underwear.'

Introducing Life Alarm for people who have fallen but don't want to get up.

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

A senior moment.

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

Sir Isaac Newton Sucks!