Aging With Grace Advocate Gifts

You Are Here - Pampoos

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"Your contents have shifted."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

Sloth 10K.

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

"We REALLY do get better with age."

"I noticed a few browns."

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

"As the years go by, and my hair recedes, I comb my parting with such sweet sorrow."

"Sitting on a beanbag doesn't take me back to the seventies- it just makes me wonder how I'm ever going to get up again."

New Hampshire Minute

The Oaks: Breakfast And Back To Bed.

Snail Pattern Balding.

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"I come from the future."

"Well, Dr. Garcia said he's doing all he can, but he can't make me any younger. But I don't care about getting younger. I just want to keep getting older."

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

"I'm pretty sure the middle-aged upper-arm jiggle is the one thing there's not a niche market for."

"Losing your fizz is very common for a man your age."

A senior moment.

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

'It's a pretty lame disappearing act Darling: I think we'd better hire a real Magician for Timmy's birthday party...'

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the best facelift of them all?

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

Sir Isaac Newton Sucks!

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

Don't laugh - when you get old, your neck will get saggy, too.

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

'Of course I'll love you when you 'go grey'... Why shouldn't I... I've loved you through six other shades!'