Aging Grace Enthusiast Pillows

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"Your contents have shifted."

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

Multi-Generational Books

'Man...You age great!'

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

Breast Height Chart

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

Old Karate Master

Snail Pattern Balding.

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

Aging Problems

"I noticed a few browns."

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

"As the years go by, and my hair recedes, I comb my parting with such sweet sorrow."

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"I come from the future."

Getting older is...making noises whenever you bend down or get back up.

"I'm pretty sure the middle-aged upper-arm jiggle is the one thing there's not a niche market for."

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

The Aging of Underwear

"Well, Dr. Garcia said he's doing all he can, but he can't make me any younger. But I don't care about getting younger. I just want to keep getting older."

"It's too late for a nose job and too early for a face-lift."

"In your 40s, hair starts growing everywhere except where it should."

"He's got a great future behind him!"

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

A senior moment.