Age Gap Adventurer Gifts

'You shouldn't be nervous about meeting my parents - you're more their age than mine!'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"One year closer to college!"

Inside One's Memory Bank

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

Off to see the world

"After grad school, and before joining Wall Street, I decided to travel a bit."

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

"I'm going to patronize India for my gap year, where are you going?"

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

You're never too old for ballet!

'Why not take some time off after high school...travel a bit...get a job...make some money...pay your own way through college.'

"Went with the hair plugs I see."

"Two, please—one senior and one tootsie."

Duel in a wheelchair.

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

'I can't believe I'm pretending to be 55 already...'

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

'You seem young, Perkins. Why, I bet I was incarcerated before you were even born.'

The Great Pyramid of Geezers

'Hi, I'm middle-age and I'll be hanging around a while.'

You know you're getting older: when your back goes out more often than you do!

Wally's dye job...makes his hair look 25 years younger.

'I have to be honest with you. I've been taking anti-aging nutrients for years. I'm 93 years old.'

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

"Try to remember, you're not 70 any more."

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'

Women

"Ha! Now no one can call me 'old'! I just overtook a sports car!"

"Don't worry, I won't hold my age against you."

"Colin's relaxation classes seem to have worked."

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."