Afterlife Contemplator Pillows

An atheist arrives at the gates of heaven.

"I just heard that when you die your social security checks stop!"

'But Mabel, I distinctly remember that the vicar said 'till death us do part...''

'You don't want to go to hell, J.B. In hell, the market is always down.'

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Good game."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"Surgery up here is free!"

"All we have left is standing room only."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

'I hope you ain't got no tax up here!'

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

"Only one of my lives was a bowl of cherries."

"Whenever it comes, Glenda, my death will be untimely."

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

"I don't want any old ones, I want my own back..."

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'I don't want this job. I worked all my life and retired. I like being retired.'

"I know you've been together a long time, but I'm sorry... Your microbiome can't follow you in."

"Shall we put it in play?"

"I was a primary school teacher. What did you do?"

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

"We'll be single again in Heaven, right?"

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

"Oh nooo, we can't skip church. Why, we'll just sleep when we're dead!"

A Male Angel throwing his Halo as a Frisbee for his Dog to catch.