Afterlife Athlete Pillows

'Another hole-in-one. I guess that was predictable.'

'Poor Dewey, All his life, he can't jump, Then he dies, goes straight to heaven, and now his wings are too small to dunk,'

Umpire holds the halos of angels playing cricket.

"Sorry, no rest for the angelic either."

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"Surgery up here is free!"

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

Devil's food cake/Angel's food cake. Delivery mix-up.

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

"All we have left is standing room only."

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"Needs to get a life"

"It's true: no more burpees."

A surprise in heaven

'We've re-branded.'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

The Reaper's Arms

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"