Advocate For Road Safety Gifts

Drunk driving.

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Man using to much bug spray

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

Dog Crossing

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

"Getting the hang of it?"

"Careful."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

Knights Wing Mirrors.

The first 10,000 fans got a concussion bobblehead!

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

Boozing and Cruising

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.

Speeding Forklift

'This is a new electronic child-proof cap. If you can pronounce the drug's name, it opens.'

"I keep telling him there's a big difference between swimming and floating."

Humpty Dumpty wearing over-the-shoulder seat belt smiles smugly.

I was coughing, Frank - I didn't need the Heimlich.

"Why'd the chicken cross the road?"

'I know a lot of you have been sharing your opinions regarding health care and I just wanted to remind you, stay out of the road!'

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty