Adventurous Investor Gifts

'What's the difference between exchange-traded derivatives and swaps?'

Speculation

'So glad we ticked the no publicity box.'

I should be a writer when I grow up...

'Based on your travels, what would you say is the greatest potential downside, if any, to investing in the Upper Amazon?'

'No, really, go ahead. You know me - I'm all about the journey, not the food pellet!'

'Thanks for being up support staff.'

Open House of Horrors

'The best grants lie that-a-ways, Ma'am.'

'Dad, I know all about the birds and the bees; explain stock-swaps and derivatives.'

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

S.S.dot.com

'I would like to see a little less adventure in this business venture.'

"Dow's up!"

"Which way up do you want it?"

'We need to target the rich and stupid.'

"Papi, can I be president of the United States?"

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

'I'm sorry, Collin, but our Dreyfus Mid-Cap fund completely tanked, so we're going to have to let you go.'

'Quick...follow that rainbow.'

Stock Market Roller-coaster.

"Gas, is it the future?"

'There's a bear on line one and a bull on line two. Who do you want me to put through first?'

'Stocks fell on the news that whatever can go wrong, usually does go wrong.'

'That's Renfrew -- he's in charge of high-risk portfolios.'

The Day Trader

Business man with places he's visited on his suitcase and places he's worked for on his chair.

"Fight or flight?"

'How did your big investment go, dear?'

Stock Hurricane Ride

Humpty Dumpty Travel Agency.

"Day trading? What's made in a minute is lost in a second."

Stonehenge Books

"I'm going to introduce you to the wonderful world of trees."

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 1