Activity Junkie Pillows

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

"I just reached 1000 jumps."

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

End the Winter Blues

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.

Off to see the world

'How effective is this new weight-loss regime?' 'We can guarantee you'll lose £50 at your signing on.'

"Spoiler alert."

That's not what I meant when I suggested you get an exercise machine.

"Can I still do my pilates?"

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

I drive, therefore I am.

"I understand the Everest climb used to be quite a chore."

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

Prehistoric Peeps: Even the 'Derby' had its primeval counterpart.

"I hate Tuesday. Tuesday I work legs."

Prepare yourself, America. Dancing with the Stars is poised to present a new 12-week competition. And you'll never guess who's dancing now! Listen to the passion and fight in our newest celebrity dancer

Pentagon Science Contest: '...It's a contest by the pentagon. They're gonna pay out half a million bucks to someone who comes up with the best idea on how people could travel to another solar system.'

'Don't worry about a few pounds up or down. Our main concern is always your bottom line.'

The size of a man's upper body is directly proportional to the number of unresolved issues in his head.

"I gave up on the wheel and designed this. You'll thank me when electricity is invented."

'Will I still be married?'

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

Internet Cafe

Isn't there something about this in th Geneva Convention

Health

Career Progression Ladder