Accidental Pregnancy Gifts

"You were an accident."

'Wait a minute! These are water balloons!' 'Well! That explains it...'

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

"Were we expecting a baby?"

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

'AAAARGH!...Get it off! Whatever the hell it is...Get it off!'

'Sorry Mrs Jones, but they're unlikely to raise the age to 13.'

"Because the 'morning after pill' is not a rectal suppository."

Mistaken identity.

'This is your lucky day!'

'I bet those are the accident reports.'

Smile??? I'm pregnant.

Pregnancy Test

"I hope your cast is not itchy, Stacy. I had an itchy cast on my arm once and it itched ALL the time. It felt like crawling ants! Itchy, itchy, itchy..."

"I don't get it. We use condoms!"

"Sorry, but that's a road racing bike. I'm a mountain bike specialist."

'The car has power steering... but the driver doesn't!'

'You should have used contraceptives -- I'm afraid your lucky socks didn't work.'

'Herbie is my substantial penalty for LATE withdrawal.'

Planned Parenthood: 'What do you mean, you want an unexpected pregnancy leave?'

"You're what?!"

"Miss Rudolf... you're pregnant!"

"Jeffrey was a surprise."

'I'm pregnant.'

"...And your underpants were unusually clean for someone who got hit by a bus."

Close Encounters of the 4th Kind...

I thought you said you didn't have any children. I forgot about my youthful indiscretion and the resulting love child.

"I thought you were on the pill."

Though unplanned, it was clear to Jim and Tammy that this newborn was a blessing in disguise.

"Hey Dad, I got a girl in trouble!"

'You should have used contraceptives -- I'm afraid your lucky socks didn't work.'

'Oh... I was supposed to swallow the pill?!'

"He was conceived in a fit of irony."

"Of course your dad loves the roller-skates you got him. He just went through the door with them."

'Boy, is Mom going to be happy when she hears we melted down her gold cards and got $950 an ounce for them!'