Accident Prone Humor Pillows

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

'Ah! ... sorry.'

'This is your lucky day!'

Artists Impression of the first call for roadside assistance...

A Not So Grand Slam.

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

'How was my emergency stop?'

Cotton candy

'No, no, I've gone through all the steps in the procedure and I don't see anything about totally immersing yourself in oil before starting the job!!

"Call the inspector and tell him to cancel today, that something has come up."

'Not THAT glass, you idiot.'

'Occupation?'

'He's so unlucky that he gets into accidents that started happening to someone else.'

"And hold the mayo."

'It doesn't work...'

'Number of days since last accident' a man is falling off of ladder while trying to post numbers...

"Well done!"

"Of all the vehicles in heaven and you had to rear-end his car?"

"Oh, that's Mr Norris. He's our risk analyst."

Please Don't Ask...

Bad experiences at an early age can affect the whole life.

Sculptor has hit block of stone, large slab has fallen on his nude model.

Mobile library.

'-and the look on his face when you overtook him in the Car Wash!'

Warning! Don't leave your crocodile unanttended at any time!

Dinosaur crossing sign.

Flammabull.

Banana Warning

Frog gets the Fly. Ouch

Speed laws enforced by gawkers at accidents.

Road Rage in the Afterlife

"Sorry, I haven't had chance to watch much TV since I went to turn down the radio, tripped over a magazine and a framed poster fell on my head..."

'Who would ever believe this started with a paper cut you kept picking at...'

"Now it's broken."

"Gues who I ran into today?"