Academic Youtuber Pillows

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

Scarcity

You wrote a book report on a video game instruction manual?

Aerodynamics Lecture room.

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

"Of course I failed you — your essay was original and unique and obviously written by a human."

"Class, this is David. He's our new financial exchange student."

'And in conclusion.'

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

'In conclusion, I hope you all go out there, get well-paying jobs, and give lots of tax-deductible gifts to our alumni fund.'

'Hard or soft science?'

Max Weber

'Physical or Social Science?'

A Brain Drain

'Spelling, math, history, geography --now the stupid school wants me to take a polygraph test!'

Chaos Theory Conference.

"The favourite practical joke amongst Big Bang theorists"

'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

University of Hard Knocks

"For the hundredth time—I have no idea how to make crystal meth."

"I've decided to have a kid."

Books on running a successful school,

'There is NO way I can perform under that kind of pressure!'

'Medea' Studies

The Milbrook Verney chair in literature. The C.K. Frebish endowment for footnotes.

"As a summation of our work it's pretty accurate...apart from the beginning, middle and end of all the words in between!"

"No, I'm not doing my homework, but I am watching a YouTube video of someone doing theirs."

Undergraduate and don

Cambridge Dons Researching Gravity.

"If you were truly blessed by genius, it wouldn't end there, believe you me!"

"I thought SAT was 'Smart Alec Teacher'!"