Academic Year Anticipator Pillows

"At this time of the summer, I hate time."

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

'You have failed on all counts...'

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

"It will be all your fault."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

Back to school.

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

"I don't like a school year that begins with 'while you were out'."

Dr. Darrin found her peer review process unnerving.

The End of the World is Nigh - man with placard

'Medieval Studies is going nowhere without a 5-year strategic plan.'

'You can never be too fit or too tenured.'

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

Dr. Prebish didn't always fit in with the other scientists.

Fortune teller describes to angler the size of the fish he's going to catch.

"Have you given any thought at all about where you might like to accrue your student loan debt?"

A self-filling prophecy.

"Let's save some time, shall we?... Yes, no, for about five years, since I was a small boy, yes, I can start on Monday. Thanks, bye."

'Waiter, there's going to be a fly in my soup!'

'Sorry, I don't do financial advice.'

Citations Needed!

Reading the future in beard stubble.

"Any kind of election is getting harder to call these days. . ."

2017 glass half full

Father Time wishes Baby New Year luck.

Doctor delivers sonogram results, which include the baby's sex, his claustrophobia, his taste for trashy women...'

"Hurry it up, Solomon Brothers are waiting for my decision"

God next to earth 'Sensational offer, last days'

'You are either going to be invited to a clock maker's factory or invent something called relative theory.'

'Madam Zora's one of our new schemes to future proof the business!'

'I plan to major in political science with a minor in strange bedfellows,'

You'll have a very happy life...I see lots of shit.

'I see you giving hillary a run for her moiney in 2008.'

"It looks like you'll be gone by half-time."